When I first came to Alateen, I was a complete control freak. I thought I could control anything and everything that went on around me, even the alcoholic. I wasted so much time trying to control his life that it made my life go down the drain as well. I never put myself first because I was scared it would lead to more fights if I didn't give the alcoholic all of my attention like he wanted me to.

That's where Step One and the slogan, "Live and Let Live," came in. I realized I didn't have the power to change him. I had to focus more on my life than on other people's lives. I had to stop pleasing other people and please myself.

As a senior, I plan to go to college next year for nursing, where I'll still be able to help save lives. Trying to change someone else is impossible. People have to want to change and the only person I can change is me.

By Tara M.
The Forum, July 2006

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